Conflict or drama?
Conflicts in relationships are normal. They simply mean that you have your own unique desires and values which are not necessarily the same with another person. We are all our own people. To coexist in a diverse world we engage in conflicts which allow us to find solutions that work.
Conflicts don't have to be about winning and losing. They do not have to be violent or insulting. Dramas are like that. Conflicts become dramas when we are not conscious about our behavior. That's when the ugliness comes up - we scream trying to prove our point no matter what and as a result breed resentment and guilt in our relationships.
Here we brought examples to show you the difference between conflict and drama. Next time, check yourself to know that you are on the right path to solve your issues.
conflict - “We explore the situation.”
drama - “We exploit the situation.”
conflict - “We address the issue directly.”
drama - “We sidestep the issue or cover it up.”
conflict - “We express our feelings candidly, taking responsibility for them as our own, without blaming the other or feeling ashamed.”
drama - “We use invective to dump our feelings on one another or engage in theatrical/histrionic displays meant to manipulate, intimidate, or distance the other.”
conflict - “We are looking for a way to keep the relationship stable, and we don’t use violence.”
drama - “We explode, act violently, retaliate, or withdraw sullenly.”
conflict - “We remain focused on the present issue.”
drama - “We use the present issue to bring up an old resentment that contaminates the present process.”
conflict - “The issue is resolved with an agreement to change something for the better.”
drama - “The issue remains an open wound with lingering resentment and ongoing stress.”
conflict - “Both of us are looking for a way to make our relationship better.”
drama - “One of us has to win and see the other lose.”
conflict - “We admit mutual responsibility for the problem.”
drama - “We are convinced the problem is entirely the other’s fault.”
conflict - “We are committed to working things out, but we respect the other’s timing.”
drama - “We insist this problem be fixed in accord with our timing, showing no tolerance for a time-out.”
conflict - “We want both of us to grow from this conflict.”
drama - “We want the other to learn a lesson.”
conflict - “We let go of our attachment to the outcome we wanted in favor of a resolution we can both live with.”
drama - “We each insist on getting our own way.”
conflict - “We are aware of any complexities.”
drama - “We see only in black and white.”
conflict - “It is acceptable to agree to disagree. If the final solution satisfies both parties.”
drama - “Ambiguity is intolerable.”
conflict - “We notice, mirror, and feel deep compassion for the other’s pain.”
drama - “We are so caught up in our own pain we do not see the other’s pain, or we think, “He/she deserves it.”
We Are Seed Publication!
We make enriching posters for condominiums in Malaysia, building communities and spreading insights that matter to people.
More Articles: