Values that make your life meaningful.
Whether you are aware of it or not, your values dictate what you do. They define you because your actions do.
Let’s say, you, being pumped up by motivational speakers and another Netflix propaganda, decided to wake up early and do a workout every day. You go to sleep earlier; you prepare your workout clothes before going to bed, you sign up for classes online. Then the morning comes, and nothing happens.
Then, you should take a closer look at what do you value in life. Perhaps, you prioritize your enjoyment and comfort much more than how your body looks or how disciplined you are. The sacrifice needed to get up from a warm bed just doesn’t cut it because you, to be honest, don’t want those results that much.
Simple as it is, we all have a set of priorities that we always follow in our decisions, some of which do not make us proud and contradict our shallow aspirations.
That is why it is essential to know why you want something.
Your why connects you to your true desires and to values you have or wish to have. Then you can compare it with your actual actions to know what your priorities are right now. Then you must decide whether you really want to change them or not.
As you might know, going according to our wishes is often not the best choice. Our feelings are quite unreliable, and we, like all animals, prefer to chill rather than work.
But think about it, If our instincts and fleeting feelings drove society, would we ever get so far? Would we find penicillin? Would we discover electricity? Would we create a system in which we can live together more peacefully and productively than ever before?
We’d just keep being monkeys. Thank God for the innate desire to grow.
It is not an accident that often we admire types of people who exhibit strong will. They are those who keep our society structure going. They can do things that others can’t in a more dreadful situation. They are the columns of our human world.
A simple person who is aware of their responsibilities in the community, in their family, and act on them despite how they feel – are the ones who have prioritized being a good person or being responsible over being comfortable.
How does it make them feel? Do you imagine they are exhausted from work and feel dreadful about their life? Yes, they are tired by the end of each day. But they do not feel dreadful as often as those who waste their time. Why? Because they derive meaning out of those actions. Read that again. Basically, their life is full of meaning.
Happiness is fleeting, even if you only do things for your pleasure. It is like walking on sand. A bit of rain, and you sunk in. It’s hard to keep your balance.
Having meaning or strong moral purpose, on the contrary, is like a stone pathway that does not fall apart under your feet and is always there to catch you when your hormones freak out again, or your sugar level drops, or the weather is not to your liking.
Things done with the inner feeling of true importance makes our contentment stick, even if it’s low-key sometimes. The work and obligations that are meaningful make people happy. All creatures were made to work. We do not do well bored or undisciplined or unobliged, contrary to modern views, where the notion of comfort is paraded around.
For example, nowadays, the popular idea is to be single and just date people you like and keep it low on responsibilities. You might have more personal freedom, but do you know that you still sacrifice things this way? You give up safety, stability, feeling connected, and a chunk of your brain energy to keep track of potential partners. If you get married, you might sacrifice your long club nights and being able to run off to another side of the world at any moment. Still, you receive stability, comfort, support, feeling safe, and having some more predictability in your life (which eases anxiety and opens up more brain resources for other matters).
Another example: you might not want to take care of your pet, but the feeling of eternal acceptance and love they give you worth picking up their poo from the road. Or do not have a dog, don’t pick up poo, and don’t bring anybody to the vet, but at the cost of having no one meet you ecstatically when you come home.
Whatever you do, there is a sacrifice. So choose wisely.
So, perhaps, we should remember what is truly important for us, for the common good, and act accordingly, with gratefulness to all others who do the same. The orientation towards the common good has been a repeating theme in many philosophies of human history. Why? Because this is what makes us feel good. We feel happier when we give gifts instead of receiving them. We feel better when we do something for others than when we act selfishly.
If you see how your life choices do not serve your well-being and relationships, maybe you’d want to ask yourself who you want to be? What kind of future do you want to have? All you do and don’t do have consequences. All choices require sacrifice. Think carefully and thoroughly.
The future you’d want for yourself can be translated into your values - desired or existing. It is up to you what are the standards of your life, so you do the choosing. Imagine yourself far ahead and see what you got to change now.
Check your values and help us all flourish further into a society that develops and grows for the better.
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