Needs Wheel. Non-Violent Communication.


Original needs wheel PDF can be downloaded for free here: https://eddinscounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/Needs-Wheel.pdf
Based on Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg, Ph.D.

Exploring needs and their meaning in non-violent communication:

Objects and behaviors (external) that are often confused as needs, which are actually strategies to meet needs (internal):(with some possible needs listed in parenthesis)

  • Money (autonomy, sustenance, support)

  • Sex (intimacy, expression, play)

  • Touch (intimacy, affection, companionship)

  • Conversation (expression, understanding, connection)

  • Time Together (connection, fellowship, closeness)

  • Food (energy, comfort, relief, nourishment)

  • Exercise (health, recreation, play, stimulation)

  • Work (purpose, meaning, sustenance)

  • Car (mobility, autonomy, convenience)

  • House (protection, comfort, shelter)

  • Chocolate (chocolate is, in fact, a need ;)

Any word that follows "I need you to…” is a strategy to meet a need, and is being stated as a demand:

  • Obey

  • Comply

  • Conform

  • Relent

  • Respect

  • Validate

  • Give

  • Be Responsible

  • Listen

  • Love

  • Accept

  • Listen

Words that imply intent and assume facts not in evidence (feelings & needs): (Use a request to check out what another person's intent may be)

  • Lie

  • Cheat

  • Manipulate

  • Steal

  • Attack

  • Ignore

  • Abandon

  • Misbehave

  • Disobey

Needs that contribute to our physical well-being: (with some possible strategies listed in parenthesis)

  • Energy (food, stored calories, oxygen)

  • Nourishment (vitamins, minerals, nutrition, water)

  • Vitality (exercise, nutrition)

  • Rejuvenation (sleep, rest)

Our previous article that explains the principles of Non-violent communication is here.

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I’m Ilona Ang. I’m an expat, a wife, a mom, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Here I share with you those gems of information that “already have been said, but nobody was listening to.” Welcome!

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